I have this rocking chair.
This rocking chair is green. It has brown spots.
My grandma never sat in that rocking chair. My grandma never knit in that rocking chair. Nope. That rocking chair does not have a stereotypical purpose. It never did. No one sits in that chair anymore. There is the occasional passerby. They sit on it, refreshed by the old-fashioned movement. Their feet move to the beat.
Back
Forth
Back
Forth
Back
Forth
Back
Forth
The relaxed motion of Sinatra’s The Way You Look Tonight quickly turns into Queen’s monumental hit We Will Rock You. What? How is a “grandma” chair the perfect description for a rock song? Well, rethink your lives, people. We’re not living in your parents’ time anymore. Everything that was out is now in. It’s a new world. It’s a new time.
Nerds are cool. Thick rimmed glasses are all the rage. Rocking chairs are made for Rock n’ Rollers, hence the name: Rocking chair. I mean it is just. So. Obvious.
How can you not have this epiphany? The structure speaks for itself. Here, let me set the scene… if I must. You’ve got the fireworks on stage. You’ve got the sketchy too-old-to-fit-into-those-skinny-jeans-wannabe-teenager guy at the corner. You can ignore him. Everyone’s wearing their rocker tees. Then he breaks out into the stage. The rocker star. We’ll call him Zayden Nix. Nix breaks out of the stage holding his six string standing on The Chair. Rocking.
Is this an unusual scene? Imagine an acrobatic singer, a stadium of 1,000, and a rocking chair. There is your scene.
He stands on the platform: dangerously rocking into the audience, dangerously rocking past the fatal tipping point. It doesn’t matter. If he falls, they’ll catch him. He focuses on the rocking, the guitar second nature to him: his third arm (a handy mutation). He leaps upon the arms…of the chair. Oh, the risky rocker. The chair enhances the amplified bass. Isn’t that just the best feeling in the whole world? The eruption of a sound. Your hands are your ears. Your feet are your ears. Their only function: to listen.
Nix doesn’t keep his feet on the arms too long. He’s a rocker. He isn’t stupid. He steps back onto the platform and makes an easy 180, walking onwards onto the back of the chair. It falls. He stays standing. A perfect landing. A Jukebox Hero.
Oh, What an ending.
Oh, What a chair.
