Illustration: Emily Lai

when clouds fall to the ground

and flowers push their petals over their faces

and an abandoned mitten from last winter

buries itself into the shivering dirt:

i look into the sky

and the sky looks away in shame


i think it’s raining hopelessness

and hopelessness becomes a flood

this wasn’t on today’s forecast—

ma, where did the sun go?

i have to turn a blind eye; after all,

we all have the same seconds left on our clock


the shooting stars are shooting hearts

burnt red bruises taint the sky

all the doors are locked and sealed

and houses shake from inside

but i don’t brace for impact, i think

i need to find you first


this stupid little town and the stupid little roads

can’t get me to you faster, and i

know once we’re hit there’s nothing

i just need to see you for a moment

and i’ll be fine when the world explodes

into bloody broken burning stardust


my shoe falls off and i don’t notice until

the soles of my feet get seared against burning pavement

that’s okay, it doesn’t matter, time is ticking,

running, barely breathing, head is spinning, i am

kicking your door down, where are you,

i am going to hold you as we die


but i wonder why your rug is all bloody

i wonder why a stained knife lies in the corner

of your dainty little living room with the cat shivering on the sofa

i wonder why your windows are shattered, and

who those figures jumping out the windows are, and

why the hell they didn’t catch today’s forecast, and


that’s not fair.

you left me first, i see your eyes but they aren’t moving,

and i hate it, i hate them, i hate the world,

and i’m not ready anymore, i just wanted to see you,

i’m not okay with dying like th