It has almost been one year since the Coronavirus pandemic arrived and shut us in like birds in a cage. The quarantine has caused many people to lose their jobs, or run out of money to pay their necessary bills. These people are now facing a financial crisis, causing them to need cash as soon as possible. However, the labour market is abysmal. Unemployment is rising, and it can be hard to find a job that can pay their bills. So, if that is you, you’re going to need to make money fast in quarantine and do not have many options to make money legally. It seems like we’re gonna have to delve into some more alternative means of income. Jobs such as drug dealing and online fraud may come to mind. However, none of these are quite as exciting or glamorous as you would hope for. Luckily, there is one career that is not only lucrative but has also been romanticized for decades by Hollywood films. Thus, becoming a bank robber is the only plausible route.

Alas, it can be a bit daunting to conduct a heist with no prior experience. So, here are 5 tips on how to rob a bank successfully.

Pick your Method

The first thing you have to remember is that there are several different methods you can go about robbing a bank. You might go into the bank, guns blazing, or you can plan out an elaborate heist and break into the vault secretly at night. Another possible method you could use is to just keep things cool and calm by walking in, passing the teller a demand note, and then walking out with the money. This simple route was the one used by former bank robber Joe Loya. He robbed over 30 banks in only 14 months by simply keeping calm, and asking for the money. You can choose which methods suit you the most. However, you must take note that robbing a bank is not unlike any other business or investment. The more risk you take on, the more money you’re going to make out of it. In the case of Joe Loya, although he robbed a whopping 30 banks, he only came out with around $250,000. Compare that to the Dunbar robbery case, which was another bank heist, only this one involved 6 men who robbed the Dunbar Armoured Facility in 1997. In just one heist, the men made off with over 18 million dollars (over 75 times more than what Joe Loya did in 30 robberies).

By evaluating your risks, you are able to find a method of thieving that suits you the best and plan for it accordingly. And you know what they say: planning is the first step to success.

Study the failures

Whatever route you decide to take, one crucial rule that you must keep in mind is to always do the unexpected. Doing what’s expected by law enforcement (or the public) will quickly lead to your capture and failure. It is important to study what past bank robbers have done in their heists, and then confuse the authorities by finding a way to do the exact opposite.

Going back to Joe Loya, he found out that most robbers undertake their first heist far away from their home, then gradually rob banks closer and closer to their homes as they become more experienced robbing banks. Eventually, the law enforcement would be able to narrow down their location by connecting the dots of the robberies.

Our man Joe Loya found this out, and so, instead of doing what most robbers do, he decided to do the exact opposite of what was expected. He robbed a bank close to him first, then slowly began going further and further away from his home in order to puzzle the authorities pursuing him.

By studying bank robbery data and recognizing the patterns, you will be able to formulate a strategy in your heists, making you more successful. In this industry, creativity is the name of the game. Think outside the box, and soon, you will find yourself inside the money box.

Teamwork makes the dreamwork

Now, let’s talk about your potential crew for this bank robbery. Every great heist starts with a great crew, right?

Well, not exactly. It is essential to first consider whether you need a squad in the first place. There are many pros and cons to partnering up with others, and in some cases, going solo might even be the best. For example, small-scale robberies like the ones done by Joe Loya are better off a one-man-project, as they will be easier to pull off and keep you from getting caught more easily.

One of the largest pros of working with other people to rob banks is that you would be able to rob bigger banks and take home bigger takes. More people in your heist can assist in suppressing the employees and the customers at the bank and can even perform specialized tasks during the heist. Bringing in people with different skill sets (vault crackers, getaway drivers, etc.) will help in increasing the overall organization of the heist, and allow you to perform more elaborate larcenies.

However, one of the largest downsides of working with other people is that you will have to trust your crewmates, who may or may not backstab you. Every other person you bring onto the team will be another loose end that you will have to worry about. In addition, you will also have to worry about their family and friends spilling the beans, having to split up the loot, and managing any potential ego problems they might have (pride, greed, etc.). I’m not trying to tell you that working with others is a bad idea, only that if you’re going to be working with others in this career, you better be able to trust them with your life.

Details, details, details

Now that you have a method and a general plan, it is time to begin thinking about the nitty-gritty details of your robbery. First, you must find a suitable bank to rob. Choosing a target is relatively simple, but some factors do depend on the scale or method that you’re going at it with. If you’re planning to go in recklessly, you would want to find out what kind of defences they have in place (panic buttons, bait money, etc.). If you’re planning to do a more sneaky covert-ops type heist, you might want to look at potential banks whose vault and security systems you can crack reliably.

Whatever bank you end up choosing, you want to have some key details. You’re going to want to ensure that the bank has multiple escape routes. This will help confuse police since they won’t know which direction you took right after the robbery. In this case, banks near freeway interchanges make for prime targets.

Another thing to consider is the type of getaway vehicle you will be using. As outlined in tip no. 2, it is better to do the unexpected. Because a lot of the general public envisions getaway vehicles to be a dark van or a rough-looking truck, you might want to choose a car that’s the exact opposite, such as a Honda or an Audi. This makes it so that when the law enforcement arrives at the scene, they’ll pass right by you when looking for any potential getaway vehicles.

Besides choosing potential banks and vehicles, there are tons of other details to consider in the heist plan itself. Details such as security cameras, surveillance systems, and anti-robbery measures such as dye packs and panic alarms are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the kinds of things you will have to account for. While we do not have time in this short guide to cover all of these points, we can give you some general advice when planning these details. Study past bank robberies, and learn from them, and know why they succeeded/failed. Learning from others’ past mistakes can help you to plan more effectively, and avoid making these same mistakes yourself. Finally, it cannot be stated enough to always strive to do the unexpected. By thinking of different ways to achieve success, you can always stay one step ahead of the authorities.

Final Thoughts

Hopefully, by using our past tips, you have successfully formulated a plan, picked out a target bank, assembled your crew, and worked out the small details. By reading these tips, you are now better equipped to plan a heist, successfully execute it, and make off with that sweet, sweet cash. One final thing to keep in mind is that all of the examples that we talked about in this guide were from people/heists who were caught in the end. This, known as negative advice, is a good way to learn, as by studying how other people got caught, you can hopefully find a way around it.

As technology advances and more and more banks begin to modernize, it will become increasingly harder to rob a bank the traditional way. So if this is the career you want to have, you better take action right now.

Theoretically, of course.


Photo: www.istockphoto.com