I often forget that I’ve only been in high school for three months (at the time of writing). On the positive side, it’s because I feel unexpectedly comfortable here—though it’s sometimes because I wish I’d already graduated. But to celebrate the fact that I can at least get to school without getting hit by a bus, here are three of my new student problems.

1. The Classic: Getting Lost

Getting lost is a staple of new schools, but it’s not a staple to have room numbers that are meaningless, which is what happens to be the case at Marc Garneau.

My social awkwardness always gets in the way of things, but I completely exasperate myself every time. Attempt number one of getting to class consisted of rigidly standing in the hallways and hoping someone would offer help. Attempt two was charging around tempestuously. Neither attempt was successful.

Eventually, I built up the courage to ask one of the scary seniors for directions, and got over my awkwardness! Just as the bell rang, I dove into the classroom in slow-motion as the world turned black-and-white! I lived happily ever after!

That did not happen. After circling around the floor multiple times, I charged into the right classroom shortly after the bell rang, enervated enough for the teacher to pity me and not mark me late.

2. Staircase Suffering

I had gotten lost in the hallways multiple times, but at least I could trust the staircases. How bad could the design of one building get?

I just wanted to go to Gym class, and I was already late by the time I cowered my way down the stairs, engulfed byshrieking children. But no. I can’t fathom why someone would design a staircase that doesn’t go to the first floor.

Thank you, stairs. I spend all this energy heaving myself through your repulsive little paths, and you do this to me.

3. The Cafeteria

Once upon a time, my unsuspecting self thought, “Wow, a cafeteria is supposed to be where people eat lunch, right? It only makes sense to eat my lunch there!”

That was a mistake. I could barely hear my own voice without screaming my throat raw, let alone hold a conversation. Why listen to music so loud? If your desire to deafen us all is that intense, at least offer free sign language lessons. I could have stood the music if it was decent, but it sounded like a goat vomiting its intestines out to background music.

Right then and there, my innocent self decided to never set foot in the cafeteria again.

The end.

I’m sure everyone reading this has experienced something similar at some point. There’s not much to conclude this rant with other than the fact that I strongly look forward to the day when I can laugh at my current stupidity, because I can assure you that there is a lot.